The ACC Does Christmas

Jasmine was reading quietly.

She wished there was a fire to read by, because that had always sounded nice. But in mid-summer where the Amazing Cat Club were spending their Christmas, it just didn’t seem to make sense to add a lot of heat to the room.

Soprano was watching a video that they’d received from Fluffy and Coco.  The twins always went all out at Christmas time, and this year was no exception. Their entire house was covered in tinsel. They leaped back and forth, chasing the ends over and over again until they collapsed, exhausted, in a pile of fake snow that they had carefully laid all over their floor.

Felicity was decorating the ACC tree, ensuring that it had everyone’s special decorations. A plane ornament for Soprano, a tiny book for Jasmine (with actual pages you could turn, which was pretty cool), a fish bone for Saki, and a simple bauble for Snooty.

Snooty was doing a crossword and snacking. He wouldn’t admit it if you asked him, but Snooty loved Christmas food. From white Christmas to stollen to panne forte – he loved it all. So each Christmas, he quietly sat, snacking away at the treats that he had been waiting all year for.

Saki was practising his jokes. Mostly on Snooty, who (since he was in a good mood at the moment) would occasionally grunt or not, which Saki used as a measure of how funny he was being.

“Hey Snooty – Where is the best place to look for Reindeer?”

“Wherever you left them!”

At this, Saki would dissolve into a puddle of laughter, lying on his back with his legs kicking out in all directions.

Snooty simply continued his crossword.

“How about this one – why doesn’t anybody have to deliver food to the North Pole?

“Because they’re ELF SUFFICIENT!”.

Snooty picked up his phone at this point to take a call. After a minute, he said, “Yes ma’am, I understand. We’re right on it.”

“Saki!” he said sharply. Saki leaped to attention, trying to stop from laughing as he listened.

“High command has a mission for you.”

“They need you to go to this address” he continued, handing Saki a note seriously “and ask for ‘John'”.

“He’ll give you a package and you need to return it to me ASAP”.

Saki grabbed the note and headed immediately to the door. About 15 minutes passed in silence, and then in ran Saki clutching a small brown paper parcel. He headed straight to Snooty (who hadn’t moved) and handed it to him urgently.

“Mission Complete!” he said.

Snooty solemnly opened the parcel and to everyone’s surprise, slowly pulled out a can of whipped cream.

“Poison cream?” Jasmine asked. “Secret message?” Felicity guessed.

Snooty ignored them, pulled the cap off the cream, shook it hard and then carefully sprayed a delicate pile on his plate.

“None of the above” he said. “I was hunting around for some whipped cream and realised that our kitchen here is poorly equipped – we don’t have a whisk!”.

“So you’re saying,” Saki said, slowly “that I just took my life in my hands on an urgent mission to get you some cream for dessert?”

“Don’t worry, Saki…”

Snooty paused, taking a forkful from his plate as he turned his attention back to his crossword.

“It was whisk-free.”

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